These walls that I’ve built must come down! I have spent years building these walls and making sure to keep the intruders out, but now that my construction is almost complete, I looked around and realized that I have closed myself in. “Hello…” “Is anyone there on the other side, can you hear me?” “I’m all alone in here and it’s starting to not feel so good…” And all this time I thought I was protecting myself. If I don’t allow you to get too close to me, then you can’t hurt me. I’ve isolated myself so much so and haven’t communicated with anyone freely in so long until my social skills are inept. I don’t mean to push you away; it’s just that I’m afraid. I’m afraid of being let down and disappointed. I’m afraid that you’ll try to take what I have. I’m afraid that you’re trying to befriend me for all the wrong reasons.
Ugh! I’ve got to find a way to tear down these walls that I’ve built because it’s getting dark in here and not much light can come in. This can’t be how I was meant to live and all I want is to be loved for real. “But Oh Lord – I’ve worked so hard to keep everyone else out, that I’ve managed to shut you out too!”
God, please give me the strength to tear down these walls the same way that I put them up – one brick at a time.
- SoSerene
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